Monday, June 22, 2015
If you are a regular reader of this blog, you know that my oldest sister passed away three weeks ago. Without going into a lot of detail, I’ll share that services are delayed until all of our family can be together in August. We did plan a gathering in her honor for those who are around for this past weekend, but before that, there was this void. In my experience, funerals help those who are left behind get on with their mourning. But in our case, we were all with her the day she died, and then we scattered. As a result, before this weekend, I struggled to find some kind of acceptance.
This sister, lover of everything ocean, surf and sand, was a collector of beach stones, especially those shaped like hearts. She had boxes of rocks all over her house, and she kept a plate of her favorite heart stones on a hutch in her kitchen. Knowing how much they meant to her, I can't tell you how honored I felt when she gave me a special one a few months ago. I wrote about that here. Keep that in mind, as I tell you this.
Every Father’s day weekend, our town hosts an art festival on our common. The local art center displays juried and members' artwork in a huge tent, and the rest of the common is lined with artisans and crafters selling their creations. Friday, I was feeling a little blue but I decided to go to the festival anyway. As I drove down to the common, a thought popped into my head. If I see anything related to heart stones down there, I’ll know Susan is with me.
I parked far away, had a long walk to the festival, spent time viewing the artwork as well as the craft displays, then got distracted when I realized I’d arrived at exactly the right time to witness an award ceremony for the juried artists. My friend's sister had been awarded Best in Show, so I stayed to congratulate her, having forgotten about the thought floating through my brain on the way to the festival. On my way back to my car, I realized I’d missed a row of displays and returned to see them.
I smile every time I look at this picture I took at the very last booth.
Monday, June 15, 2015
Things I've Learned Over the Last Year and a Half.
Always listen to your body.
It is easier to do the right thing, even if it may not feel that way before you do it.
Anger has no place when life is finite.
Say what you need to say. One day, you won’t have that luxury.
It’s important to live in the here and now, but don’t forget to remember.
Never underestimate the importance of honesty.
The hardest thing you have ever done becomes less so, if it means managing someone’s pain.
“Someday” is not a guarantee.
Love needs no words, but say them anyway.
The earth offers up symbols. Believe in them.
Monday, June 1, 2015
After spending the morning gardening, I sat on the back step by the hummingbird feeder reading last weekend. One persistent little guy kept returning to drink and each time he did, he cast a shadow on my book. So, I grabbed the camera, focused, and held the position until he arrived again.
So, my dears. I’ve had a loss in my life. My oldest sister succumbed to cancer on Friday, May 29. It was long and painful and her death was one of those things people call a blessing. It just doesn’t feel that way to me right now. I’m not sure when I’ll have the heart to write a real blog post again, but if you don’t see me here for a while, know that somewhere I’m writing, because that’s how I heal.
Blessings to all. And if life gets challenging for you, remember to look for the hummingbirds.